Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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