The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
The struggles of a small town man whore
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
