**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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