it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Randomize
