I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
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