we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
