you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
