be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize