I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
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