Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I take back everything I said about communal showers
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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