Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
