I molested 6 butterflies tonight
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
