you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize