This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
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I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
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I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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