Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize