btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
