yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Randomize
