I wanna bring you to show and tell
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Did I show you my penis last night?
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I think my nap took me to another dimension
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
