Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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