This is not my ceiling
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
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just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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