i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
