You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
