how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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