I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
