Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
