I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.