Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Randomize
