I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
