yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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