Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
They are going to name an STD after you.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
