I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I wear drunk well.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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