If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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