Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
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