Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize