he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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