The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
