oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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