FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
