when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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