True but thats because hes a fetus.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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