Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
