Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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