can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
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