I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
