1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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