she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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