Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize