think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
