32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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