I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I have aggressive nipples.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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