i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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