Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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