I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
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